Practical uses for video games besides Army recruitment...

The future looks bright for gamers. Thanks to the great, inventive and brilliant people at NINTENDO, it looks like even as early as 5 years into the future, the stereotype of a gamer could change from an overweight, friendless loser to an in-shape, party animal with great social skills.

Today I was reading my monthly issue of Electronic Gaming Monthly (EGM) and came accross the preview of Wii Fit, due out in the Spring, a personal trainer in your home at your disposal 24/7. The game comes with a balance board controller (right) that will use sensors to read the mass that is distributed throughout your body. When you start the 'game' it will take your weight and then ask you to input your height. Then it will calculate your body mass index (BMI) to track your fitness level. It will do so weekly and, if I understand the concept correctly, it will, through the various gameplay modes (which haven't been clearly discussed anywhere I can find yet) help you lose weight or at least tell you how over or under-weight you are. Aparently the Mii that you've created for the Wii will also fluxuate it's body type based on how thin or full bodied you may be.

Wii games in general can make you work up a sweat, just ask my roomates. Heated and intense games of Wii Sports tennis or Mario and Sonic at the Olympic Games can escalate heart rates and result in a fair share of sore muscles.

The folks at Wii, and Nintendo in general, have already given the gaming community the ability to shape and sharpen their minds through video games with titles like Big Brain Academy: Wii Degree (Left) and Flash Focus for the Nintendo DS. This trend of self help through video games is actually very refreshing and offers some hope for our increasingly overweight and obese society.

We've all seen those (annoying) commercials where the mom tells her kids "Make sure you're playing your video games!" Pretty soon, if the general trends continue for younger gamers and for family ethics, this will become an increasing part of our reality. It's crazy to think that what we used to do instead of real things are actually quickly growing into...real things.

Holy homoeroticism Batman, look at those chums...

Over the summer I picked up an issue of Newsweek (or maybe it was TIME) because I had a do-nothing job and wanted to look kind of smart. Also it teased a very interesting article on the cover. The article was about male relationships in movies and what makes a true love story in today's medium.
It was a brilliantly perceived article that expounded the theory that the real love in movies today is shared between the men in the films and not necessarily the man and woman the movie is about. The thesis of the piece was genius. As soon as I read the few paragraphs that explained the general idea I instantly said "Wow, this is totally right!"

Superbad was at the heart of the story, because at the time it was all the rage in theatres and in the forefront of America's pop-culture mind. Last night, after watching only the first few minutes I realized how much it actually fit into the guy-love bible.

So with that in mind, I have set out to document the top-10 Man-Love couples of all time. What follows is the closest dude duos in pop culture.

10) Turtle, Eric, Drama and Vince

Not a duo, I know. What a way to start the list, ruining my alliteration. However, you can pick any two of these four young men and prove the point. What is this show about if not the relationship of these guys and how it changes with fame, fortune and fornication.

9) Jay & Silent Bob

Striking a chord for Hetero-life-mates everywhere, this fantastic example of male on male love has been around since the 90s. Although their time on the big screen is over (or is it? Kevin seems to be changing his mind lately), their love will live on through the ages.

8) Colin Mockery and Ryan Stiles

Though it doesn't exactly fit the category of love stories or even stories, these two are as thick as thieves and a chummy as any two men can be. They've kissed countless times on television and have been known to dry hump as well. (But its all in good fun)

7) Steve-O and Heroine Bob

It is heartbreaking when Steve-O awakes to find his partner in crime (and nothing else) has past away. Some great acting by Matthew Lillard gives credibility to the couple's cuteness. SLC Punk ain't exactly a love story but I defy you to not see the love in it.

6) Chucky and Will

It's not his fault...that their love is so strong. It's apparent that their relationship reaches beyond friendship. The scene where Affleck pours on the homoerotic love over lunch on the roof of a truck is just the prime example of duodom and dudes diggin' on dudes.

5) Dr. Gregory House and Dr. James Wilson

This one is more of a love/hate relationship but still the connection is undeniable. One of the greatest episodes of the series, and their relationship, is when Wilson moves in with House and the practical jokes abound. However, the heart of this story is diagnosed with a case of man-love when House erases a phone message that would allow Wilson to move out....oh the things we do for love.

4) Mikey and Trent

They're so honeys and they don't even know it. I feel that's enough to say about this couple, and its probably the worst pun in the whole piece. But I digress. Mikey is searching so hard for love the entire movie but what he doesn't realize is that he's got the perfect beautifully baby right in front of him. He just needs to stop battin' at the bunny with his big claws and sink those huge teeth into his taller half.

3) Dan Rydell and Casey McCall

This duo shares an office, a desk, a love of sports and sometimes they don't have pants on. These sports reporters are more than co-hosts of a nightly sports show, they're co-owners of a lovely man crushes. Dan and Casey will always be "along side" each other.

2) Turk and JD

It's just guy love....between two guys. Whether taking fall foliage trips on their scooters, going to CHiPs conventions, or saving lives, this couple brought man-love to a whole other level. JD will always remember that time that Turk was inside him (don't worry, it was a medical procedure) and Turk will always have the love of his honkey adonis.

1) Dante and Randal

They love pop culture, Star Wars, their jobs and...each other. Any man who didn't get a little choked up at the jail scene in Clerks II just does not have a heart in their cavernous and cold chest. This pair just goes to show that at the crux of every Kevin Smith movie there is a warmth and heart that centers around the relationship of all his male protagonists. The greatest realization of this is his first, and most recent, incarnation of the dude love scenario.

(Photo credits...

Entourage www.nymag.com

Jay & Silent Bob www.uwyo.edu

Colin and Ryan www.ukgameshows.com

SLC Punk www.photobucket.com

Good Will Hunting www.wikedlocal.com

House www.tvguide.com

Swingers www.lazydork.com

Sports Night www.nerdsonsports.com

Scrubs www.usatoday.com

Clerks www.cinemalogue.com

For those about to (fake) rock...

(Me Rock Banding under the randomly chosen moniker Digital Friday
inset: Judy Nails, my favorite character to play as on GH)

"You know, Shaun, if we spent as much time on a real guitar as we are going to in the next couple of months on this thing (Holds up Guitar Hero II controller), we'd be pretty damn good at guitar!"

Yeah, I guess my friend Nate was right. I would be a pretty mean guitar playin' machine if I had spent half as much time practicing on my Ibanez as I've spent on my PS2. But where's the fun in that?
I mean, think about it, in games like Rock Band, Guitar Hero and Karaoke Revolution, one can take on the persona of a bunch of different, although stereotypical, avatars and rock out to the best of your (fake) ability, to dozens of recognizable songs. Not to mention that as a white male I can play as a black guy with dreads or a really hot chick. But why do we play these games instead of actually picking up a guitar?
My American Pop Culture professor says that minstrelsy and transvestism are good enough reasons to do so. (And that comment on my paper made me mad that I hadn't thought of something so witty.)
Basically what it comes down to is instant gratification.
Today, as I had promised him he could, my friend's little brother came over to check out Rock Band. He was very impressed with the drum kit that comes with the game, as was I when I first brought it home. This kid actually owns a drum kit but chose to come over to my house and play the game instead. Why? Because he rocks at it!
Starting out on EASY mode, he picked the song "Say It Ain't So" by Weezer. (An instant favorite of everyone who I've played the game with so far--probably because its easy as pie.) I picked up my (fake) Fender stratocaster and we started to rock. He hit about 89% on his first try at the game, I kicked it up to expert and hit around 95-96%.
Neither of us, well I can speak confidently about myself, my younger friend might be a different story, would be able to do anything close to that on our first try playing along on actual instruments. I've actually tried to play this song before and trust me, it didn't sound anything like Weezer--or even guitar for that matter.
We queued up our next song and he turns to me and says, "I'm going to bump it up to Medium. That was too easy!"
Approximately 3 and 1/2 minutes after putting the game in, he has already felt some sort of accomplishment besides smacking small pads shaped like drums in time with a great tune.
That feeling of being too good for a difficulty level is a pretty sweet feeling, and it's not just a youth thing either.
After my 4.5 hour RB session with Jordan, my sister called while i was chowing down on some dinner. She and her boyfriend were going to drop by for....you guessed it, a little ROCK BAND action!
Our band, Mondo, took to the stage and opened up with more Weezer. My sister took to the skins, which is particularly hilarious when I consider her complete lack of ability to find any beat in real life. Her boyfriend picked up the bass and I took to the six-string.
We all scored over 90%. My sis on EASY, her man on HARD, and me on EXPERT.
"Dude, if I play bass on the next song I'm gonna kick that shiz up to HARD." (I'm not lying that's pretty much a direct quote...I didn't pick him.)
So we kicked it up a notch, in song choice and, for Mike, in difficulty.
We failed. (Don't look at me i didn't make any mistakes but Mike hit hardly anything, I should have warned him sooner that he'd have to use all 5 fret buttons.)
"Alright, alright...I got this" he said as he clicked RETRY, surprising both me and my sister. On just our second attempt at something that kicked our butts the first time, we managed to score a 5-Star rating.
Let's face it, it's a lot easier to play 5 frets on one string than it is to play approx. 21 frets on 6 strings. We're just too lazy and too hard on ourselves to try and play real instruments anymore. We don't play real sports because our guys are ranked all 99s in Madden or NHL '08 (Though to my own surprise I've finally learned how to make Shaun Kreider, a 22 year-old Left Wing from Dublin, Ireland, a 79 ranking overall so that I'm still available at draft time and then ratchet up my stats with practice and a good head coach.)
In all video games we can be who we WANT to be and not who we are, and when you get down to it...that's just way more fun!